Self Reflection: are you in search of your goal and destiny? Do you sometimes ask why you are here in this world or where you should move next? Are you searching for an answer and hoping the world wisdom will guide you in finding your dream and your calling?
While I’m stating the fact (I’m not referring to the religious specific search or questions) I was surprised how many people did ask this question, regardless how successful they are in their career….and you may said – I don’t believe you – why are these successful persons asking such a fundamental questions, and if they are indeed questioning themselves, they are not successful in the first place?
Well, this is where you’re wrong – soul searching happens in various stages of the life and career.
This question is part and partial of life and it prompts us to reflect on our goals and to maybe reset our goal setting, and reset the strategies as well.
Inspired by a familiar Chinese folk tale, this 90 million animated Disney drama follows the adventures of a young maiden woman in ancient China. Mulan, who was rejected by the matchmaker because she was different and not as “sweet” as the other ladies in the village had set her on fire, and , decided to prove that she worth something and ran away to fit her father’s place in the Chinese army.
Mulan learned that her weakened and lamed father was called up into the army in order to fight the invading Huns. Known that he would never survive the rigours of war in his state, she decided to disguise herself as a man and took in her father’s place in the army.
She prayed to her family’s ancestors for protection and luck before left as a man in her father’s armor with her family’s horse. The ancestors awoken and decided to send Mushu, a little dishonored dragon to aid Mulan in her quest. The journey began……. (you’ll have to watch MULAN – Disney 1998 to be the whole story)
- Mulan was in search of her own identity and what she called for – in short, her dream.
- Destiny was not kind to her – she was rejected by the matchmaker (in Ancient Chinese, being a wife candidate was the utmost important in a woman’s life and being rejected basically mean you are shun as an outcast!). Furthermore, her old and weakened father was called to join the army, and she knew he would never survive the war.
- Destiny had miracle way of presenting the opportunities to us; sometimes it came as opportunities disguised as challenges. That’s why it’s sometimes called blessing in disguise. Either we live it to up and accept the challenges before we see the underlining opportunities or we could just sit there and complain life is being unfair to us!
- Mulan took the challenges and moved into the unknown territory and moved out from her comfort zone. Little that she knew this new adventure brought her more than what she had bargained for in the first place!
So, at various stages of our life, we are forced to do some self reflection on our goals. Either you are a beginner, searching for your identity or you are at crossroad of your life, and you are at the stage of unsure what to do or where to move next, it’s a good to PULSE and take a step back to reflect and do reality check on your goal.
If we are too busy, if we are carried away every day by our projects, our uncertainty, our craving, how can we have the time to stop and look deeply into the situation-our own situation, the situation of our beloved one, the situation of our family and of our community, and the situation of our nation and of the other nations? ~ Thich Nhat Hanh Quotes
Here are the 6 self reflection steps that can lead you to success:
1) Do a self reflection and realities check
- Look at yourself in the mirror. Be honest with yourself, evaluate where you are currently versus where you want to be? Have you achieved your initial goals?
- If yes, congratulations. Time to move on to new goals. Maybe change to move to new career goal, setting up new business, etc. Moving goals are a good indication of success in life.
- If no, assess the root cause and how far are you from your goals? What’s the gap?
2) Check against your priorities – have the priorities changes over time?
- Ask yourself – what is the most important in your life now? Is it money, career, family, or personal development? What do you want to achieve this year? Even if you have successful achieve previous goal, and you are at crossroad of the next direction, take time to evaluate what is most important to your and your life so that you could align your move to your priorities.
- Sometimes your priorities may have changed over time, and your initial goal set may not be relevant anymore.
- And it is okay to change the goal to suit your changing priorities, but don’t change your goal because you fail to achieve them. Never hide under the disguise, remember you only answerable to yourself, if you dishonest to yourself, who else will be honest to you. Only YOU accountable for your own achievement and happiness!
- Never hide under the disguise “God is not fair”! Opportunities are disguised in form of challenges. Challenges mould our character and strengthen our foundation. STEP UP to it and NOT step down to the challenges.
3) Setting goals or resetting your goals
- Set goals which align to your current priorities.
4) Plan or reset your plan
- Once you have the “end of mind”, plan your strategies to achieve your new goals.
5) Strategize into various action plan to achieve the goals
- It’s good to be able to break the plan to achievable step by step goals, which each goal could be break into various action plans and could be measurable. If you are starting your own business or just learning to analyze Boilinger Bands, you should always break the process in small steps…
- Small steps are easier to achieve than the giant steps. No wonder you cannot achieve your goal if you keep setting the big steps to achieve the goal.
Small win is better than no win at all. Small wins keep you going.. no win get you frustrated!
6) Plan review at interval quarters and the cycle starts all over again from #1 to #6.
- •And of course, finally review review review… always make time to review your goal setting and plan at interval timeframe to assess where you are today!! Again, reality checks!
So regardless what and where you are today, take time to look at the mirror and reflect……….
“The journey into self-love and self-acceptance must begin with self-examination…until you take the journey of self reflection, it is almost impossible to grow or learn in life.” ~ Iyanla Van Zant (from her book “Until Today”).